The Power of 'No': A Somatic Boundary Setting Guide
Can you think of a time when you found yourself saying yes to something, but your body was telling you no?
Maybe your shoulders tensed up, your stomach felt uneasy, or you noticed a tightness in your chest. These are just a few of the ways our bodies try to communicate when something doesn’t feel right.
I hear from so many clients who struggle with setting boundaries. If this sounds familiar, know that you’re not alone, and there are ways to navigate these moments with more ease.
Why Boundaries Matter
Boundaries aren’t about being rigid or unkind—they’re about creating space for what matters most to you. They allow you to protect your energy and well-being, and show up authentically.
When we aren’t used to setting boundaries, it can feel uncomfortable or awkward. Our nervous systems may freeze up, leaving us unsure how to communicate what we need. But boundaries are vital for preserving our emotional and physical health—and for cultivating relationships that are built on mutual respect and understanding.
How Somatic Practices Can Help
Your body is often your best guide when it comes to recognizing and honoring your limits. Somatic tools can help you tune into the signals your body is sending and find clarity in moments of uncertainty. With practice, boundaries become less about confrontation and more about connection—both with yourself and with others.
Here are two simple somatic practices to support your boundaries this season:
Pause Before Responding
When someone makes a request, take a moment to check in with yourself. Notice what’s happening in your body—your breath, posture, or any areas of tension. Do you feel calm and aligned with saying “yes,” or is there hesitation? This pause can be a powerful first step in honoring your needs and responding in a way that feels true to you.
Ground Yourself in "No"
With your feet on the floor, take a deep breath and exhale slowly. Imagine your “no” as a steady wave of calm, helping you stay centered as you hold your limit. This practice can bring a sense of ease and stability to what might otherwise feel like a difficult moment.
Boundaries Create Space for What You Value
When you honor your limits, you make room for what truly matters—to you and those around you. Setting a boundary isn’t just self-care; it’s a way to protect your energy, nurture your well-being, and strengthen your relationships.
If conversations about boundaries feel challenging, remember that it’s okay to seek support. Learning to listen to your body’s wisdom and communicate your needs takes practice, but it’s a skill you can develop over time. And you don’t have to do it alone.
About the Author
Shai Maxine is a trained somatic practitioner specializing in helping people navigate stress, chronic pain, and emotional overwhelm. With years of experience guiding clients toward greater ease and connection, Shai offers practical tools rooted in somatic awareness and mindfulness. When not working, Shai enjoys hiking, cooking, creating art, and petting as many dogs as she can. Follow along on instagram @shai.maxine
