5 Ways To Regulate When Activated By A Trigger
We’ve all been there—something happens, and suddenly, we’re overwhelmed by a flood of emotions. It could be a comment from a loved one, an unexpected email, or even a seemingly harmless situation that sets off a powerful internal reaction. This reaction, often called being "triggered," can throw us into a state of heightened emotional distress. When triggered, our nervous system goes into overdrive, and we may find it difficult to think clearly, remain calm, or respond in a balanced way.
As a somatic practitioner focusing on chronic pain and anxiety reduction through trauma work, I help clients navigate these moments by teaching them how to regulate their emotions, especially when they’re triggered by past traumas or stressors. The good news is that emotional regulation is a skill that can be learned and strengthened with practice.
What Does It Mean to Be Triggered?
A "trigger" is any stimulus that reminds the brain and body of a past experience of danger, even if no real threat is present in the current moment. Triggers can be external, like someone’s tone of voice or a particular setting, or internal, like a physical sensation or thought pattern.
When we’re triggered, the body often enters a survival mode known as fight, flight, or freeze. The nervous system perceives danger and reacts by preparing to defend, escape, or shut down. While this response was helpful in truly dangerous situations, it can become problematic when it’s activated by everyday stressors or memories of past trauma.
Why We Struggle with Emotional Regulation
Emotional regulation is the process of managing, expressing, and modulating our emotional responses to stress. For those who have experienced trauma, emotional regulation can be particularly challenging. Trauma alters the brain and body’s ability to accurately assess safety, meaning that triggers can feel overwhelming, as if the original traumatic event is happening all over again.
When the nervous system is stuck in survival mode, it becomes difficult to access the tools necessary for self-soothing or calming down. As a result, we may feel hijacked by our emotions, experiencing anything from anxiety and anger to fear or numbness.
5 Ways to Regulate Your Emotions When Activated by a Trigger
The key to emotional regulation lies in building awareness and creating safety in the body. Here are five somatic techniques you can use when you feel triggered to help bring your nervous system back into balance:
1. Pause and Ground Yourself
When triggered, the first step is to pause and ground yourself in the present moment. This can be as simple as feeling your feet on the floor, noticing your breath, or using your senses to reconnect with your surroundings. Grounding helps your brain realize that the current situation is not the past event that your body is reacting to.
Try this: If you’re feeling activated, take a moment to press your feet into the ground and wiggle your toes. Notice the sensation of the earth supporting you. Place your hand over your heart or belly and take a deep breath. Let the exhale be long and slow, signaling to your nervous system that you are safe.
2. Name the Emotion
Once you’ve grounded yourself, identify the emotion you’re feeling. Are you anxious? Angry? Sad? Sometimes, just naming the emotion can reduce its intensity because it allows your brain to process what’s happening. Naming an emotion also creates a small bit of distance between you and the feeling, which can help you avoid being completely swept up by it.
Try this: Quietly say to yourself, "I’m feeling ________ right now." For example, "I’m feeling anxious," or "I’m feeling frustrated." Notice how naming it shifts your awareness.
3. Use Breath to Shift Your Nervous System
Your breath is a powerful tool for regulating your nervous system. When you’re triggered, your body often goes into a shallow, rapid breathing pattern that signals danger to the brain. You can counter this by deliberately slowing your breath, which helps calm the nervous system and shifts it out of survival mode.
Try this: Practice 4-7-8 breathing: Inhale deeply through your nose for 4 counts, hold the breath for 7 counts, and exhale slowly through your mouth for 8 counts. Repeat this cycle 3-4 times. This type of breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps bring your body into a state of relaxation.
4. Tune into Your Body Sensations
Triggers often manifest physically—tightness in the chest, a racing heart, or a pit in your stomach. Instead of trying to push these sensations away, gently bring your attention to them. By being present with the body’s sensations, you allow the nervous system to discharge some of the activation. This process helps the body release stored tension and return to a regulated state.
Try this: Close your eyes and scan your body for tension or discomfort. When you find an area that feels activated, gently place your hand there. Breathe into that spot, offering it kindness and attention. Notice if the sensation begins to shift or soften.
5. Practice Self-Compassion
Finally, it’s crucial to treat yourself with kindness when you’ve been triggered. It’s easy to become self-critical or frustrated when you feel out of control, but these moments offer an opportunity to practice self-compassion. Acknowledge that being triggered is a normal response to past trauma or stress, and that you are doing your best to navigate it.
Try this: Say something kind to yourself, like, "It’s okay that I’m feeling this way. I’m safe now, and I’m learning to take care of myself." You can also place a hand over your heart or on your cheek as a gesture of comfort.
Healing Through Emotional Regulation
The more you practice these techniques, the better you’ll become at regulating your emotions when triggered. Over time, your nervous system will learn to respond to stressors in a healthier, more balanced way. This doesn’t mean you won’t ever be triggered again, but it does mean you’ll have the tools to handle it with more grace and ease.
By building emotional regulation skills, you can create more space between the trigger and your reaction, which allows you to respond rather than react. It’s a powerful way to reclaim your sense of safety, reduce anxiety, and ultimately, heal from the past.
